Happy Halloween!

Growing Up

Hello, boys and girls.  I know.  I know.  I haven't posted in a while.  Sorry.  Here's a juicy one that will (hopefully) keep you satisfied.

So, where do I begin?  As you know, I moved out on my own earlier this year.  I mean, not COMPLETELY on my own.  I had 3 roommates which would later turn into 1 roommate.  And that went pretty well for the last 8 months.  THEN, my roommate got preggers.  That was a super interesting day.  She went from hysterical laughter to balling her eys out to laughing again to a state of total calm then back to crying and laughing.  So soon after finding this out, she and her boyfriend decided to move in together.  Now, when I say this, I don't mean he was moving into our apartment.  I mean they were getting an apartment for them to raise a kid in, which left me with the task of finding my own apartment.  MY FIRST APARTMENT.  No roommates, no parents, no nothing.  Just me.  A "big boy" apartment, as I like to call it.  So after looking at a few, I found one that I LOVE, signed some papers, wrote a check, and got approved.  After all this, I thought, "Shit.  I'm really out on my own now.  I'm growing up."  And I became sad a little.  I have always said I don't wanna grow up.  But I guess everyone grows up at some point whether they want to or not.

Also, I was promoted at work a month or so ago.  I am now a Shift Manager at the restaurant I work at.  (I can't name the place I work at in blogs, my stand up act, or anything else online.  I could get fired if I do...)  I never thought I would ever be an authority figure of any kind ever.  I mean, I'm immature.  The words poop and peepee make me giggle, I make fart and dick jokes, I have Power Ranger bed sheets.  Yeah, like I said, immature.  And they made ME a manager.  Again, another step to growing up.

Lastly, if you know me then you know I love being single.  I love girls, plain and simple.  I'm always on the look out for the next girl.  I can't help it, that's just the way I am.  The number of girls I've had sex with may shock you.  (I have gotten tested.  Yeah, THAT many.)  So, needless to say, settling down was the FURTHEST thing from my mind.  My last girlfriend was back in 2008.  And then SHE walked into my restaurant.  Now, I'll be honest, this wasn't a "love at first sight" type of thing.  My first thought was "She's good looking.  Wonder how long I can get her out of those clothes."  Then I kept seeing her every few days.  She is a regular at this place and gets the same thing every time.  Pad Thai with chicken.  So one day, I'm at the Mall of America and I run into her.  I'm like "Hey, you come in to my store all the time" and she's like "Yeah, you serve me my food."  Not the most romantic of meetings, I know.  But we started talking, went on a few dates, and now we're dating.  Come on.  Me?  Dating someone?  I know, it's crazy.  But I really like her.  My eyes don't wander as much when I'm with her.  (They still do, just not as much.)  Like I said, I'm growing up.

Everyone grows up at some point.  I'm not a completely different person, though.  I still make fart and dick jokes, I still laugh when I hear poop and peepee, I still have those Power Ranger bed sheets (with matching pillow case).  But I'm definitely more grown up than I was a year ago.  I have my own 1 bedroom apartment, I'm a Shift Manager at work, I have a girlfriend.  Pretty soon I'll start reading newpapers and worry about mortgages and tucking in my shirts.  Growing up is a part of life, and I'm embracing it instead of fearing it.

P.S. I'm wearing underwear now.  I never use to.  Comando was how I rolled, but not anymore.  What has happened to me?!

Commercials ("Selling Out")

Hola, amigos.  Ti amos de la tacos and burritos.  Pour favor las matadors et Carlos uno dos tres salsa.  Wanna know something funny?  All my non Spanish speaking readers will probably think I was actually saying something in Spanish back there.  Fun fact: it's just gibberish.

So, my last few posts haven't really been written blogs.  Just posts of things I like (shoes) and a video I made.  I'm thinking I will do this more often.  I can blog more this way, since I don't always have interesting things to write about.  My goal is to blog once a week.  But don't hold me to that because that probably won't happen.

If you follow my posts, chances are, you watch my videos either on Youtube or Facebook.  And if you watch those, you know some of the first videos I've made were commercials.  These commercials weren't originally supposed to be the jump off point for Elephant Stomp.  Hell, before (and during) the commercials, there WAS NO Elephant Stomp.  Those 6 commercials were made by 4 friends hoping to win some money from an online video contest.  After making those commercials, we as a group decided to keep making videos because it was so damn fun.  And thus, ELEPHANT STOMP was born.  And 20 videos later, I'm going back to the start.

I'm always looking for some sort of video contests to participate in.  I've made a few on my own (not with Elephant Stomp) but these were for a different website.  Now I learned that the site I first made commercials for is having another contest.  I've written a few commercials and have gotten positive responses from those who have read them.  I plan to shoot and upload these soon.  The deadline for this contest is May 30th.  Funny how deadlines motivate me to get shit done.

Now, I've had a few people give slightly negative comments about me making commercials.  Comments like "Commercials are a crutch.  Make original videos.  Leave the commercials for when you run out of things to make."  Or "You make these commercials to win money?  You're selling out now?"  People don't intend to sound mean or hurtful when they say these things.  They really don't.  But here's what I say to them.  Commercials can be more challenging than completely original videos.  With skits, I have no time limit to tell the "story" or whatever.  I can go anywhere with it.  With commercials, I only have 30 to 60 seconds to tell a "story" and to be funny and to get the point across.  Believe me when I say this is WAY more challenging to do.  And as far as selling out?  I guess I see where they are coming from, but I would have made these videos just for fun.  I don't need the possibility of getting money or free products to make a video.  Just the satisfaction of making the video, editing it, and putting it out there for others to see is enough for me.  I enjoy it.  It makes me happy.  I like to enterain.  With having said that, I could win A LOT of money for these videos.  Grand prize is $8,000 plus a trip to France for 3 days and nights.  So yeah, that's a pretty good incentive to make some videos.  But again, I would make these videos for free.

And if you're wondering what site I make these commercials for, it's Mofilm.  Go to http://www.mofilm.com/ to check them out.  Go ahead.  I'm not worried about competition.  I embrace it.  It challenges me to do better.

So, there you have it.  A brief (or not so brief) post about commercials and why I do them.  Again, not doing them just for money, not doing them because I've run out of ideas.  They are just videos to me.  A commercial is just another video.  And video making is fun.

Until next time, blog readers...

Shoes

One of these will be my next footwear purchase. And by "one of these", I mean pair of shoes.  I'm not going to buy just 1 shoe.  That would be too silly, even for me.  Leaning more towards the first pair.

SPRING

Hey, guys.  Or should I say ladies?  In a recent google search for myself (Yeah, I do that) I have found through insights and other such things that most of the people that look up Ryan Juntunen (me) are females.  I don't know how the internet knows the gender of users, but apparently females between the ages of 17-25 look me up the most.  And to that I say, my number is 218-96....  Just kidding.

Seriously though, do you smell that?  That's the smell of Spring, ya'll!  The snow is gone (mostly), I can see grass, basically everything outside is wet, the sun shines everyday.  I love it.  It is fabulous.  I'm not gay, I swear.

So, along with a new season comes a new wardrobe.  Spring fashion is in full swing.  I have been searching internet sites and window shopping like a madman for the last few weeks.  I'm putting together a wishlist for clothes, shoes, etc.  I swear I'm not gay.

But as the wishlist grows, my closet must shrink.  I have way too many articles of clothing now and I soon have to carry out the daunting task of sorting through it all.  I seriously have some shirts from when I was 16.  And amazingly, they still fit.  Not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing.

As you may or may not know, I live in Burnsville.  Now, there are some good stores to shop at around here, but if I want to actually dive into Spring Fashion Fever, I have to travel northwards to Minneapolis.  And I have.  I've been to Minneapolis probably 5 or 6 times in the last 2 weeks.  That's not including trips to Acme on Monday nights.  (Yeah, I still do stand-up.  Come watch.)  Here's the thing about going to Minneapolis for me.  I take 2 buses and a train.  And that's only 1 way.  But I can't complain.  I love public transportation.  And riding the train makes me feel like Ra's al Ghul at certain points.  If you don't get that reference, it's ok.

Some of my favorite places to shop?  Hmm.  Ragstock has always been a favorite of mine.  Urban Outfitters is also a point of interest for me.  Herritage 1981 is another.  Then there's the usual places people my age go to.  PacSun, Zumiez, Gap, etc.  Then there are the occasional trips to JC Penny's and Macy's, but I only go there to buy jeans.  I'm pretty sure I'm leaving some places off the list, but I can't think of any more at the moment.

Then there are shoes.  I LOVE SHOES.  I don't know why, but I can't get enough shoes.  No, I'm not gay.  I own 11 pairs of shoes and I'm looking to purchase more soon.  The shoes I want to buy are mostly dress shoes.  I'm a firm believer that dress shoes can be worn during any occasion.  Even playing sports or jogging.  FACT: one of the first things a girl notices about a guy are his shoes.  And if you are wearing dress shoes, you've already got one foot in the door.  Well, in my experience it's been that way.  I also think this might be the year that I cave in and buy a pair of sandals.  But that's where the Douche Transformation stops.  I won't wear socks with these sandals nor will I wear wife-beaters, Ed Hardy shirts, or Affliction shirts.  I can't tell you enough how much I hate those things.

There are more good things great about spring time, but I mainly wanted to talk about clothes and such.  I'm sure I could ramble on about other spring things, but I'd rather go out and take advantage of this beautiful day.  Look at the pretty flowers.  I'm not gay.  I swear.

Stand Up Comedy

So, no greeting on this post. I wanna write this while it is still fresh in my mind.

Since I was 17 years old, I have wanted to try Stand Up comedy. I'm 21 now and I finally performed. How did it go? I'll tell you...

It was AMAZING! I got bigger laughs than I thought I would get. I mean, I thought I'd get some decent sized laughs, but they were laughing pretty hard. I'm still riding the "center of attention" high that I got earlier tonight.

I performed at the Acme Comedy club in Minneapolis. They have Open Mic on Monday nights and it is free to watch. You have to get there pretty early to sign up. Sign up is at 6 pm and the show starts at 8 pm. So yeah, pretty early is a good description. So, I get there around 5:30 and wait at the bar til sign up. Around 6, people start flooding in. By "people", I mean other Comedians. And in my head, I was like "Oh boy, these people are WAY funnier than I am". I'll admit, I was a little intimidated. Then the sign up sheet came out and I signed up. Now, I didn't know that not everybody would be able to take the stage. Some people wouldn't be able to go on because there's not enough time to get everyone on stage. But thankfully, I made the list.

So, I take my seat in the comedy club and wait for my name to be called. I'm the 4th person up, so I have a little bit of time to wait. Then my name is called. BUT the announcer didn't say my last name. The announcer said "Ryan J." How dare he not even attempt to say my last name. But that's ok. I really don't mind. So, I get up on stage and take the mic and start in on my first joke.

Now, my jokes aren't really punchline jokes. I tell stories. I'm a story teller. A funny story teller. But my first joke is sort of a punchline joke. I list off some of my favorite words. Then I say one of my favorite words is sometimes thought of as a "gay" word. If you say this word, you're a cock sucker. You like dick in your mouth, in your butt, or maybe you like dicks on your dick. A gay word. But I don't think this word is a gay word at all. And the word in question is (throwing glitter in the air) FABULOUS. I got huge laughs with this joke. The I went on the say I am a huge movie fan. I asked the audience if they could guess what TYPE of movie I love the most. Someone in the audience yelled "Gay Porn?!". I replied, "Close. Musicals." Huge laughs from the audience again. Then I said that I loved musicals so much, I wished my life was a musical. But I don't want it to just be during big emotional moments. I want it to be during mundane moments. Then I proceeded to sing songs about sitting in a drive-thru line and about pumping gas. Again, laughter from the audience. Not as big, but hey, I can't spit gold all the time. Then I started talking about a weird embarrassing thing I do sometimes on accident. It's something I call "Dinosaur Arms". It's where if I'm standing around, not doing anything, my arms will go to my sides like a T-Rex and I won't even realize it sometimes. I then demonstrated this and got some pretty big laughs. But then the red light came on and I had to get off the stage. I couldn't even finish the joke. Oh well. Next time.

But the best part was that after my set, a bunch of comedians commented on the glitter that was on the stage and they commented on my joke. MY JOKE WAS ON THE LIPS OF SEVERAL COMEDIANS! That was the highlight of my night I think.

So there you have it. The story of my first attempt at stand up. And you can bet that I am going to be doing it again and again and again. Come out and watch. Acme Comedy Club on Monday Night. And other places in Minneapolis. Just search Open Mic Comedy in Minneapolis on Google and chances are, you'll see me there.

My Life: Chapter 3

Heeeellllloooooo, baaabbyyy. (Big Bopper, anyone? No? Ok.) How is everyone doing? Good? Since I can't actually hear your response, I'm just going to assume you're good. Oh boy, a lot to write about.

What does the title of this post mean? Well, it means I'm starting a new section of my life. But where is chapter one and two? Chapter one is my birth all the way through to graduating high school. Nothing exciting in particular happens in this chapter until near the end. More specifically in the 8th, 9th, 10th, 11th, and 12th grade. School pretty much ruled this chapter of my life and it was all I knew about life. So, what was chapter 2 then?

Chapter 2 started as soon as I removed my graduating cap and gown. I was no longer a kid in school. I was now an adult. Well, more of an adult than I had previously been. I mean, I was still a kid mainly but I was an adult kid. A "man boy" if I could be so bold. I worked at a grocery store for almost a year before trying to make a life on my own. I moved from the small town of Chisholm to St. Paul somewhere in the middle of this chapter. I lived with a few friends for about 3-4 months. Then, I moved in with my dad and grandpa for about 3-4 months after that in Minneapolis. After not being able to find a job and support myself, among other things involving my father going to jail, I had to move back in with my mother and step father and my 3 little half brothers in Chisholm. This is where I started this blog, moving back to Chisholm. So, if you've been avid reader, you know what happens in the rest of this chapter.

Now turning to Chapter 3. I now live in a 2 bedroom apartment in Burnsville, MN with 3 other people. I've been here for about 1 week and 1 day. You know what? I love it. I can't tell you how unhappy I was in Chisholm. Almost all my friends left for college, there was really nothing to do for recreation, and I only worked 3 days a week. Needless to say, I was bored out of my mind. I needed a change. That's why I moved here. It's sooo great here. The mall is a 20 minute walk away, the grocery store is right across the street, there are several dinners down the road as well as Target, Barnes and Noble, tons of coffee places, cafes, and so much more. It's pretty convenient considering I don't have a car anymore.

So, how did I come to living with 3 other people? Well, I'll tell you. One day I got a text from a girl I know. She wishes to remain anonymous, so for the purpose of this blog she'll be known as "Leah". Leah asked me if I wanted to move in with her and 2 other people. I had never met the other 2 before and I was a bit skeptical so I told her I'd think about it. I never actually intended to think about it. But about a week later, she asked me again. And then I ACTUALLY started thinking about it. And in about a week's time of thinking, I decided to do it. To move in with this girl and 2 strangers. Pretty bold, eh? I thought of it as an adventure. I love adventures. So, I saved up some money, gave my 2 week notice at my job, and got out of Dodge.

But wait, what does this mean for Elephant Stomp? I'm sure if you're reading this, you are also a viewer of Elephant Stomp videos. Well, sadly, we won't be making videos for a long while. I mean, we'll still make videos when we can. And I'm sure Blake and Nick will make some videos together. Or they SHOULD at least. And I will have more videos of course. Just be sure to go to my Youtube page to see if anything new is up. www.youtube.com/ryanjuntunen

So, there you have it. The beginning of Chapter 3 in the story of my life. As always, I'll update you as I go along. There really isn't anything to report other than I'm enjoying my new life. Oh, and my new roommates are super nice and friendly. I can't believe I was actually worried.