Stand Up Comedy

So, no greeting on this post. I wanna write this while it is still fresh in my mind.

Since I was 17 years old, I have wanted to try Stand Up comedy. I'm 21 now and I finally performed. How did it go? I'll tell you...

It was AMAZING! I got bigger laughs than I thought I would get. I mean, I thought I'd get some decent sized laughs, but they were laughing pretty hard. I'm still riding the "center of attention" high that I got earlier tonight.

I performed at the Acme Comedy club in Minneapolis. They have Open Mic on Monday nights and it is free to watch. You have to get there pretty early to sign up. Sign up is at 6 pm and the show starts at 8 pm. So yeah, pretty early is a good description. So, I get there around 5:30 and wait at the bar til sign up. Around 6, people start flooding in. By "people", I mean other Comedians. And in my head, I was like "Oh boy, these people are WAY funnier than I am". I'll admit, I was a little intimidated. Then the sign up sheet came out and I signed up. Now, I didn't know that not everybody would be able to take the stage. Some people wouldn't be able to go on because there's not enough time to get everyone on stage. But thankfully, I made the list.

So, I take my seat in the comedy club and wait for my name to be called. I'm the 4th person up, so I have a little bit of time to wait. Then my name is called. BUT the announcer didn't say my last name. The announcer said "Ryan J." How dare he not even attempt to say my last name. But that's ok. I really don't mind. So, I get up on stage and take the mic and start in on my first joke.

Now, my jokes aren't really punchline jokes. I tell stories. I'm a story teller. A funny story teller. But my first joke is sort of a punchline joke. I list off some of my favorite words. Then I say one of my favorite words is sometimes thought of as a "gay" word. If you say this word, you're a cock sucker. You like dick in your mouth, in your butt, or maybe you like dicks on your dick. A gay word. But I don't think this word is a gay word at all. And the word in question is (throwing glitter in the air) FABULOUS. I got huge laughs with this joke. The I went on the say I am a huge movie fan. I asked the audience if they could guess what TYPE of movie I love the most. Someone in the audience yelled "Gay Porn?!". I replied, "Close. Musicals." Huge laughs from the audience again. Then I said that I loved musicals so much, I wished my life was a musical. But I don't want it to just be during big emotional moments. I want it to be during mundane moments. Then I proceeded to sing songs about sitting in a drive-thru line and about pumping gas. Again, laughter from the audience. Not as big, but hey, I can't spit gold all the time. Then I started talking about a weird embarrassing thing I do sometimes on accident. It's something I call "Dinosaur Arms". It's where if I'm standing around, not doing anything, my arms will go to my sides like a T-Rex and I won't even realize it sometimes. I then demonstrated this and got some pretty big laughs. But then the red light came on and I had to get off the stage. I couldn't even finish the joke. Oh well. Next time.

But the best part was that after my set, a bunch of comedians commented on the glitter that was on the stage and they commented on my joke. MY JOKE WAS ON THE LIPS OF SEVERAL COMEDIANS! That was the highlight of my night I think.

So there you have it. The story of my first attempt at stand up. And you can bet that I am going to be doing it again and again and again. Come out and watch. Acme Comedy Club on Monday Night. And other places in Minneapolis. Just search Open Mic Comedy in Minneapolis on Google and chances are, you'll see me there.

My Life: Chapter 3

Heeeellllloooooo, baaabbyyy. (Big Bopper, anyone? No? Ok.) How is everyone doing? Good? Since I can't actually hear your response, I'm just going to assume you're good. Oh boy, a lot to write about.

What does the title of this post mean? Well, it means I'm starting a new section of my life. But where is chapter one and two? Chapter one is my birth all the way through to graduating high school. Nothing exciting in particular happens in this chapter until near the end. More specifically in the 8th, 9th, 10th, 11th, and 12th grade. School pretty much ruled this chapter of my life and it was all I knew about life. So, what was chapter 2 then?

Chapter 2 started as soon as I removed my graduating cap and gown. I was no longer a kid in school. I was now an adult. Well, more of an adult than I had previously been. I mean, I was still a kid mainly but I was an adult kid. A "man boy" if I could be so bold. I worked at a grocery store for almost a year before trying to make a life on my own. I moved from the small town of Chisholm to St. Paul somewhere in the middle of this chapter. I lived with a few friends for about 3-4 months. Then, I moved in with my dad and grandpa for about 3-4 months after that in Minneapolis. After not being able to find a job and support myself, among other things involving my father going to jail, I had to move back in with my mother and step father and my 3 little half brothers in Chisholm. This is where I started this blog, moving back to Chisholm. So, if you've been avid reader, you know what happens in the rest of this chapter.

Now turning to Chapter 3. I now live in a 2 bedroom apartment in Burnsville, MN with 3 other people. I've been here for about 1 week and 1 day. You know what? I love it. I can't tell you how unhappy I was in Chisholm. Almost all my friends left for college, there was really nothing to do for recreation, and I only worked 3 days a week. Needless to say, I was bored out of my mind. I needed a change. That's why I moved here. It's sooo great here. The mall is a 20 minute walk away, the grocery store is right across the street, there are several dinners down the road as well as Target, Barnes and Noble, tons of coffee places, cafes, and so much more. It's pretty convenient considering I don't have a car anymore.

So, how did I come to living with 3 other people? Well, I'll tell you. One day I got a text from a girl I know. She wishes to remain anonymous, so for the purpose of this blog she'll be known as "Leah". Leah asked me if I wanted to move in with her and 2 other people. I had never met the other 2 before and I was a bit skeptical so I told her I'd think about it. I never actually intended to think about it. But about a week later, she asked me again. And then I ACTUALLY started thinking about it. And in about a week's time of thinking, I decided to do it. To move in with this girl and 2 strangers. Pretty bold, eh? I thought of it as an adventure. I love adventures. So, I saved up some money, gave my 2 week notice at my job, and got out of Dodge.

But wait, what does this mean for Elephant Stomp? I'm sure if you're reading this, you are also a viewer of Elephant Stomp videos. Well, sadly, we won't be making videos for a long while. I mean, we'll still make videos when we can. And I'm sure Blake and Nick will make some videos together. Or they SHOULD at least. And I will have more videos of course. Just be sure to go to my Youtube page to see if anything new is up. www.youtube.com/ryanjuntunen

So, there you have it. The beginning of Chapter 3 in the story of my life. As always, I'll update you as I go along. There really isn't anything to report other than I'm enjoying my new life. Oh, and my new roommates are super nice and friendly. I can't believe I was actually worried.

No More No Shave November

Greetings! Gosh, I'm so happy. This last month has been pretty brutal. No Shave November. Whoever thought of that is a G D B. BUT I passed the test of this stupid tradition. I didn't shave for the whole month. However, I have very little to show for it.

It's December 3rd now. Yes, I know. I'm a little late with this post. But I wasn't late with the shaving. I shaved at 1 in the morning on December 1st and it was GLORIOUS. I felt free. I felt light. I felt... smooth. I'll let your filthy minds think about that any way you want. Ugh, I'm so glad that month is over. I doubt I'll ever do it again. So not worth it. Well, its not with my case anyways. You'll see what I mean when you look at the pictures.

Well, I think I'll keep this post short and sweet. Here are the pictures. Before and After.

Why can't I grow a decent amount of facial hair? Why?!

No Shave November: Day 19

Hey, gang! Holy Hannah. It's already been a whole week since I blogged last. I almost forgot to post today. Which, I'm sure, would have been a real bummer to the 2 of you who actually read my blog.

Well, I haven't given up yet. I'm still hanging in there. It's not too difficult anymore, actually. I'm not thinking about shaving as often as I was a week ago. Now, by saying this, I am in no way saying I'm keeping the facial hair. Come midnight on November 30/December 1, the hair is freaking going bye bye. It hasn't really grown any fuller within this last week. A tiny bit, but nothing noticable. It's so stupid, really. I hate it. But what can I do? Can Rogain work on facial hair?...

In other news, I'm thinking about moving at the end of next month. Well, not thinking about it. Doing it. I'm about 98% sure I'm moving next month. Where am I moving? Burnsville. I know. I know. Not too exciting, right? Wrong. This will be the first time I'll actually be on my own. Well, I'll have roommates, but basically I'm on my own. I'll be moving in with 3 other people. 1 I know, the other 2 I've never met before. It'll be...interesting. An adventure! I'm actually really excited about it. December 26th can't get here soon enough. (That's the move date.) I'll have more on this in a later post.

Well, that's all I've got for now. I think the next post will be the last No Shave November post. So expect that on December 1st.

And, of course, the picture. Please don't laugh TOO hard.

No Shave November: Day 12

It's been 12 days since I've shaved. I feel I'm growing weak. So tired. So thirsty. Can't. Think. In. Head. Where are my razors?

I'm not even half way through and I'm already thinking about abandoning ship. What little facial hair I HAVE actually grown is really quite pathetic. I've got the stupid Mexi-stache going on, some chin hairs that looks just sad, and a pair of adorably lame side burns. Why am I not able to grow a beard that would make Chewbacca proud? That's all I want. Can Santa just bring me THAT for Christmas? Please?

*SIGH* I can't give up. I just can't. What would Santa say? What would Chewbacca say?! NO. I must keep going. I must keep growing. Even if it does make me uncomfortable. I just wanna know how ridiculous I look after this is all over. I might even keep the hair in the end. (No way am I keeping the hair in the end.)

On a side note, I was called cute today while I was in the check out line at Wal-Mart. A group of girls were behind me and they were whispering to each other. Not whispering softly enough because I could hear them. Well, I assumed they were talking about me. They said, "He kinda looks like Taylor Lautner." "Yeah. He's cute." Of course, they could have been talking about Taylor when they mentioned the cute part...

And as promised, the picture of my pathetic facial hair growth. You have to look closely.

No Shave November

Greetings, everyone! Happy No Shave November. What is No Shave November? It's really quite self explanatory. During the month of November, you are not allowed to shave. Self explanatory? Yes. Simple? Yes. Stupid? YES.

I've known about this really stupid tradition for more than a few years now, but I've never participated. Partly because I like my face to be clean shaven. Partly because I truly feel this tradition is pretty dumb. But mainly because I can't really grow facial hair. I'm Native American, what do you expect? I mean, I can grow some pretty sweet burns and a little bit of chin hair and also a pretty pathetic mustache. The longest I've gone without shaving was about a week and even then I was disgusted with myself. So I can only imagine how I'll feel by the end of the month.

Why did I decide to participate THIS year? I'm not really sure. Curiosity, I guess. I just want to see what I'll look like with a month's worth of facial hair. And to be honest, I'm secretly hoping that I can grow a decent beard. Now, I'm not aiming for anything like Pickle's or Grandma's ability to grow a beard, but hopefully 1/8 of what they can grow. If you know Pickle or Grandma, you know what I'm talking about.

It is currently November 4th, so I really don't have anything to brag about. YET. But I plan to do a few more November blogs accompanied with pictures of my pathetic facial hair. Until then, buh bye.

Wait, does No Shave November include pubes too?...

Writing

Ahoy there, blog readers! Long time, no blog. I missed all of you. Except for you, Jimmy. Take a shower once in a while and then I'll miss you.

So, I haven't posted in a while and thought there's no better time to do so than now. (Not really, I'm just finding ways to procrastinate from writing.) But seriously, I do have some things on my mind.

First, I have some projects I want to work on. And by "projects", I mean films. Come on, if you're reading this blog, you should know that. I've written a few short films and episode 2 of a web show I wanna do. I'm actually preparing to start shooting one of the shorts. It's called 'Let's Be Friends'. I know, lame title. But despite the title, it's good. Or so I'm told. I've got the cast all together and they all love the script. So, be on the look out for the finished film in the not too distant future.
Along with the filming of that, I also have outlines and ideas for 8 more shorts. I just have to find motivation to actually sit down and write these scripts. It's not that I'm not excited about them, I just have trouble getting motivated. It's like the case of episode 1 of my web show. I had the idea of this show in my head for almost 2 years and never wrote it out. There was actually a contest online for web shows that got me to write it. The deadline was in 2 months and I was like "This is perfect! Time to write." This happens to me a lot. I need a deadline or some kind of push to write stories out.
I also have more ideas for silly Youtube videos. If you haven't seen any of my previous vids, go here...
www.youtube.com/theelephantstomp
BUT, filming these videos has become hard. Most of the Elephant Stomp group has split. Pickle is going to college in North Dakota. Blake is going to college in Duluth or Superior (one of the two). And Grandma has become a working madman. I can never get a hold of him. But I still have faith that we will pump out more videos. I'm just more focused (a little) on short films and stuff like that. More "credible" film projects.

I've also decided not to go to film school til next year. I just want to make as many films as I can before heading off to college. You know, have some experience under my Ninja Turtle belt before working alongside some big deal people. That's right, I have a Ninja Turtle belt. Be jealous.

I guess that's all I've got for now. I'm off to go and try to write my newest short film idea. It's called Dream Couple. Speculate on what it is about however you want. In the words of Tigger, ta ta for now. I hate myself for knowing that...